All my life, all I have ever wanted to be was a writer. When I was a teenager, I had stories and poems published. I thought that was a great start. But when I started to get serious about wanting to be a writer for a living, as a career, I got a lot of negativity from adults. Not my parents. My parents were always supportive of anything I wanted to be. My Mother, herself, is a wonderful writer. But through all my research and all my discussions with people in ‘the biz’, I got discouraged and I felt that my writing was never going to be good enough to be published on a serious scale. So I stopped writing for a long time. I threw away all my tear sheets, all my copies of publications where my materials had appeared. I got rid of all of it. I didn’t see the point on dreaming a dream that was never going to come true.
In my early twenties, I started writing again. Again the negativity of the industry came at me.
“It’s really hard to get published.”
“You have to know someone.”
“You have to have an agent.”
So many things were thrown at me. I continued to write, for myself, because I love to write. I kept notebooks and binders of my work. But I didn’t seek to have anything published. I kept it to myself. I shared my writing with those close to me, but at that time in my life, it wasn’t for the public. It was for me.
Still in my early twenties, I suffered events that broke my soul. I had always tried to see the best in people and tried to believe that no one was truly evil. I was proven wrong and my entire view on the world was changed. My heart and soul was truly broken and I stopped writing altogether for many years. I believed that there was nothing in me that anyone else would want to read. Nothing that could come from myself, deep down, would be any good.
Several years later, I met my husband. Through his gentle guidance and support I slowly began to heal. Through the births of my children, I found joy again and though still broken inside, I was able to love freely and trust once again. Ten years later, I am ready to write again.
It occurred to me recently that all through those years of hearing negative thoughts on the writing profession, no one had ever told me that my writing was not good enough. No one had ever told me that I was not good enough. But through their words, that’s what I heard. It’s what I believed.
I may post other things on this blog that do not pertain to writing, but those things hide the fact that I put my heart on here for you to read each time I post a OneWord. Each time I post an article or writing for you to read, I am asking for your support. Silently seeking your approval and your acceptance of me as a writer.
So, thank you. Thank you to those who Like my OneWord postings. Thank you to those who read and enjoy my writings. And thank you to those who know me personally and support my dreams through your friendship and love.
I am very excited to announce here on my blog, that I have dedicated my next several months and years to writing books that are long overdue. I am working on a piece of fiction, where I am participating in the Camp NaNoWriMo for June. (I’m behind in my word count right now, but I’ll finish it, I promise!) The other piece I am beginning work on is non-fiction and is very close to my heart. But, I can’t reveal the topic just yet. I hope you will all wait excitedly for the next several months until my book(s) are complete.
Wish me luck!
Happy Writing! 🙂